Random thoughts

I totally lose track of time. My appetite was so bad that I had only 5 spoonful of rice and I felt like vomiting. I guess the only smile I made today was when my student asked me some riddles. Even my little student felt something was wrong with me today.

My bed was the only place I wanna be as it will stop me thinking about anything for a moment. I looked at those materials you have gotten me.. and I teared. I looked at myself in the mirror and I felt like slapping myself really hard to wake up from DENIAL. I hate the word MOVING ON.. but I simply just have to. Like what Dre says.. the silliest thing to do is to heal a wound and opening it again!

Feeling is a mutual thing (quoted by dearest kooichi). Yes, I feel that I'm always the one on stage clapping enthusiastically alone and you're always in a far away place not even bothering about the loudness of the clap. Its always me thinking that its POSSIBLE and you're always having ur own thoughts without having me in your picture.

I hate it when I have to start my life afresh once again on my own. I gave my love life a 0 percent LIFE. I have no more mood to step into another relationship. I'm old enough to be played by anymore people. I feel like starting a family business selling clothes. I just feel like getting out of this country.. venturing into a new society where young boys wanna have fun will be eliminated from there.

I wont be smoking, drinking (that much) and dance ard like an idiot anymore. I'm happy with all the friends I have especially SONNY who never fails to pick up my call whenever I feel like shit. FOR THAT.. I WILL CRASH COURSE ON FRIDAY!!! AND.. there's this particular someone whom I cant say out his name.. but I really wanna thank you for being there too even though that means driving from one place to another and then back to other place and back to my place. I know it was a bestie frenly kinda gesture but I totally appreciate it alot. Thanks! And Lisa.. I know I know.. you're so worried about me. I also know that you will probably slap me real hard if u see me in this condition now... Thanks for walking with me through this shit.

I will be fine.. I really will!!