I was jerked.

You know how funny it is that when after a breakup, u always THANK the partner for everything and all the love and stuff? I'm so not going to do it for this particular one. I was JERKED by the same guy over AGAIN. I know some might think I shouldn't do it over here but I totally feel so dirty and stupid after knowing so much. I've no intention of tarnishing his reputation but I'm just so STUPID.

This blog was started for him and everyone knows about that. All the posts are all for him.. and mostly are so loving that I still smile and tear upon reading it again. I wont delete all these post but I will have a new blog sometime soon or maybe a new layout. I always thought his love was genuine even till the day he tells me he needs a breakup but I was so wrong. What do u mean by you love me for at least 10 mths? Thats like DEJAVU lar.. he told me the same thing in the first breakup too. I looked back at the photos we do after the 10 mths.. and I laugh at myself.. at my STUPID RETARDED HAPPY face in all the photos. So whats with the shopping for clothes, shopping for PSP, sentosa trip and etc etc for? BREAKUP mth?

I didn't feel sad but just disappointed with myself. A leopard can never change its spot.. and why didnt I go for that advice. I disappointed with my mum for giving birth to a stupid girl.. who is always being cheated by guys. She was so worried for me that she kept telling me that I'm too good for him and she believes that the next guy that comes by will be an understanding and lovely guy. I finally understand why alcohol can solve every misery night.. cause I did that last night and finally I slept.. but for a nicely 5 hrs only.

I seriously never met someone lidat b4. Most of my friends might be abit mischievious but not to the extend of this. At least they have have got the sympathy side and knows how to use words in the correct manner. I might look ok to u but how fine u want me to be after hitting me hard with those words? 10 mths seems nothing to u at all? LOOK.. its 10 freaking mths in ur ARMY LIFE ok? I see u through the BMTC stage till a sgt rank.. and though at times I feel angry with the schedule but still.. I supported u! Dun mind running the extra mile to top up ur PREPAID card to hear and see ur sms and phonecalls. Dun mind going to JB to buy games for u without u coming along with me. Dun mind hearing my parents nag when I didnt attend ANY of their get together session. Dun mind having no sleep to meet u up early in the morning to do stuff together. Dun mind heading to the clinic when I had only 5 hrs of sleep. Dun mind making all the trips down even though I wasnt feeling too well. I feel like I have done 3 yrs of things even though its 10 mths short and yet.. u can ignore all these and tell me u dun even wanna think about it and then act like a clown in front of me by not staring right into my eye and talk like a man. You said so many evil things and yet you think u said nothing that HURTS me?

AHHH..... all these are killing me. How can a young man learn to be so cruel. KNNCCB seriously.

I'm a virgo and I totally pray really hard that I'm NOT GOING TO BE A STUPID GIRL AGAIN. I wanna stand upright and save more money and spend on MYSELF and not on others.

I'm sure everyone who predicted that this would happen will probably have their toes laughing and do that OBI OBI GOOD signature dance now. Well.. u guys did the right thing I suppose.. I should be laughed at by my horrendous stupidity acts!!