FAILURE is a mother to success

My eyes are swelling from all the crying and emo shit. I woke up having a seriously bad feeling and then when I get to see my hp, I saw brian msg saying that the results are release but not MAB. I wasnt really that enthu but I still went to turn on the computer and to my HORROR.. I failed that most irritating SUBJECT... LAW! My heart totally sank and I felt so HELPLESS! I message everyone and felt even worst when I realise everyone PASS. I went back to sleep with tears until an hr later... BRIAN message me agn to check my mab result. I was feeling SHITTY again.. and guess what... I FAILED MAB. I felt like a total LOSER. How could I ever fail 2 subject at a GOAL.

The feeling totally suckz. I cried like as if I failed for my O LEVELS or something. Its wierd that I'm crying for myself that I didnt work hard instead of crying because of what my parents would say. I felt so shit that I have thoughts of quitting sch. I guess this blow was simply too harsh. I kept crying and baby was all along on the phone trying his best to cheer me up and knock some sense into my head. I couldnt bring myself up to talk to any of my sim pals cause I know they did dairly well. I dun wanna see myself acting in front of them and so I log off immediately after I saw that horrendous result.

I still have to go for my tuition even though I'm so upset. My eyes were so tired from the excess tearing. Thank god that my student gave me a good news on his results. He scored all 90 plus for his subjects and his english was 98/100. Well.. gonna spent money on his present again.

Got back home and back to emo state. Chatted with Shaye and yes.. I feel much better. Messaged Angela and told her abt the horrendous result. Well.. it was my first time msging her but I was amazed by what she say.. FAILURE IS THE MOTHER OF SUCCESS. I was like WOKEN up by this sentence.

Dad got home and I told him abt the NEWS. I cried AGAIN! I hate myself sometimes lar.. JUST cannot act strong abit one lei.. tears machiam auto FLOOD ur eyes lidat one lor. I initially plan to tell him in a cutesy way but ended up he comfort me because of my tears. Gheesh. But anyway, dad was pretty OPTIMISTIC. He gave me a funny reaction that I NEVER expect he will do. He actually SWEET TALK to me and gave me a AIYO..... I WONT CANE U LAR... DUN WORRY. FAILURE is good.. at least u LEARN!! HUH!!!! Hahahaha... well.. these words are definitely very encouraging. I felt so much at ease but also.. it kinda motivates me to work 10000000 times harder. Trust me.. LAW n ACCTs.. u 2 modules better watch out.. I'm so gonna study fuck u two upside down. fucking 2 modules cause my dad to spend another 3k and also half a mth of my time. Grrr...!!!

And because it wasnt from my income, I still feel a bit pai seh on failing this two modules. Baby was surprise over my dad's reaction too. Wahahha.. thats why I always think I have a sort sort teh daddy.. very temperamental one. Can only tell him certain things on a certain time. Anyway, he's heading to TAIWAN tomorrow.. Wooo WEEeee... I'm so gonna drive his car out tomorrow to fetch baby on MY OWN. Am I scared? Erm... not really.. I'm gonna be brave.


Went over to gab house yesterday on my own for MAHJONG SAKE. hahaha! They went to pluck mango b4 i went. And when i reach.. they were playing BOXING. hahaha! I thought I was at the wrong house for a moment. Manage to win 4 bucks over all. Syl drove me home for once in a new mini cooper. He allow me to test drive his car ard gab house. Wooo.. but well.. he was scared too!






I guess after all this shit that happens... I realise something. I realise that baby is always there whenever shit happens to me. Though not physically there ALWAYS but his words always hits me hard. He is always there encouraging me and making sure I'm alright. I seriously need such people in my life. I guess I will feel even worst if not for him. His calls and numerous message are always words of care. NOW... there's a promise from me to him and that is... I PROMISE TO WORK GAZILLION TIMES more FOR NEXT SEM! Hm... fucking hate to repeat module. First time in 22 yrs.